As for our mental health, we've talked with a councillor who confirmed our thoughts that maybe we should have a back up plan. So we talked with our Dr. today about other options to make sure we will have a family someday.
As of today we have a few back up plans in the works.
1. We've contacted CCRM for a phone consult. Basically, we're having a difficult time with the whole "unexplained" diagnosis. We've done 4 IVFs and are no closer to a diagnosis. Both of our RE's have used lovely catch phases like "it is what it is" and "welcome to human nature". Today we were told that IVF is just like rolling the dice and we have most likely just been on the other side of the stats for our cycles. Yet, these doctors don't seem frustrated that their profession has a black hole of knowledge. We just want to hear the Dr. at CCRM say the same thing as our newer RE. Then, I guess we'll have to believe that there is just no more information to be gained or explanations to be had.
2. We have learned the process of donor eggs and have a somewhat local contact. The problem with this plan is that we don't actually know if it's my eggs or his sperm that is causing embryo failure. But still, this is a plan to think about and see if we're comfortable with it.
3. Adoption - the word is out there now and we've been mulling it over. I have a contact through my mom who I'm hoping to get some preliminary questions answered through. We'd like to know how long it can take, how much it costs and what the first steps are. I would like to have contact information for an adoption agency before going into this IVF, so if we fail again we can start this process ASAP.
So now that we have some plans, I instantly feel more sane. I continue to have my emotional issues from spending the work days with pregnant co-workers and client's who want to know why I'm not a mother. But we have a plan so someday, hopefully, we'll be able to look back on these dark days and be proud of ourselves for getting through them.
